Not optimistic

Every month I use positive thinking (maybe a little too much) and try to picture myself pregnant as a way to release as much stress as possible. Then when AF shows every month, my emotions plummet back to earth. This month I not feeling too optimistic about my chances. So far my Nov/Dec chart looks an awful lot like my Sept one and that ended up a BFN, so I'm preparing myself for a repeat. I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything and that God could bless me with a miracle, (heck I didn't think I was pregnant the month I did get pregnant with DD), but this month seems different. Maybe its a self defense mechanism so I don't get disappointed.

Plus, on top of that, I really think there is a good chance I O'd on cd16 instead of cd18 based on what my temps do on previous good/strong O charts. The only thing that is holding me back for sure, is the EWCM I had on cd17. Guess we will see one AF arrives, then I can subtract my LP to confirm when O was (even FF seems to like those two choices). And if AF doesn't arrive, well, then it won't matter because I will be pregnant! There I go with that positive thinking again........:-)

Just for visual reference, I overlaid the charts so you can see what I mean. Sept chart is in green, current Nov/Dec chart is in purple.

This one shows current O on cd18.

 

This one shows current O on cd16.